After giving birth to her second child, veteran actress Meryll Soriano opened up about her dark past when she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and undergoing treatment against drug use -- all while being pregnant with her eldest.

In a vlog tackling postpartum depression, Soriano recalled how difficult 2007 was for her, getting pregnant with her first child while her romantic relationship back then was also falling out.

It was also during the pregnancy when she started seeking medical help to fight drug use alongside bipolar disorder.

“Can you imagine yung journey ko na chaos? Kasi hindi ko pa naman kilala yung bipolar at that time. Kailangan ko pa i-assess yung sarili ko,” Soriano said.

“But, wala rin akong time nun because that was also the year that I started my sobriety from drug use. In short, I was all over the place,” she continued.

According to the actress, the bipolar disorder was new to her back then, confusing herself from being a risk-taker.

“Meron pala akong condition. So, yun nga, hindi ko pa kilala yung sarili ko with this bipolar disorder thing, and in denial po ako noon. Ang dami kong gusto kong gawin,” Meryll admitted.

• Meryll reveals baby with Joem took ‘planning and trying’

When she reached the fourth month of her pregnancy with her eldest son Elijah, she started to embrace her condition but unfortunately her disorder triggered postpartum depression.

Elijah is her son with actor Bernard Palanca.

This was the time when she would think of hurting herself, the baby, and even taking her own life.

“Grabe yung hormonal changes and talagang I was in a terrible place. I had the thoughts of suicide. I had thoughts of hurting myself,” she revealed.

Luckily, Meryll had two doctors who monitored her health.

The clinical psychologist and psychiatrist helped her cope with her condition as her family seemed to not understand what the actress was going through.

“It was a journey with my psychologist and my psychiatrist. Kaya I really encourage you guys to have one or to talk to your doctors kung paano kayo magkaroon ng extra support sa part na yun,” Soriano quipped.

• Meryll Soriano sa mga basher nila ni Joem Bascon: 'Wala akong time for it'

Meanwhile, in her second pregnancy, Soriano is thankful she has yet to experience postpartum depression, owing it to her partner Joem Bascon.

According to Meryll, it was a big help to have Bascon on her side because he took care of their needs aside from being ready to have another child.

“This time around siguro, I have Joem. Laking tulong po niya saking personal needs as his partner and needs ng baby. Talagang natutulungan po niya ko,” she added.

Editor's note:

A group in the Philippines is dedicated to addressing those who have suicidal tendencies.

The crisis hotlines of the Natasha Goulbourn Foundation aim to make these individuals feel that someone is ready to listen to them.

These are their hotline numbers:

Information and Crisis Intervention Center
(02) 804-HOPE (4673)
0917-558-HOPE (4673) or (632) 211-4550
0917-852-HOPE (4673) or (632) 964-6876
0917-842-HOPE (4673) or (632) 964-4084

In Touch Crisis Lines:
0917-572-HOPE or (632) 211-1305
(02) 893-7606 (24/7)
(02) 893-7603 (Mon-Fri, 9 am-5 pm)
Globe (63917) 800.1123 or (632) 506.7314
Sun (63922) 893.8944 or (632) 346.8776

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