Cory's daughter recalls last days with mother in The Buzz

ABS-CBN News

Posted at Aug 03 2009 01:00 AM | Updated as of Aug 03 2009 09:00 AM

(Excerpts from interview of Kris Aquino-Yap by Boy Abunda in The Buzz, August 2, 2009)

Mom was hospitalized June 23 kasi hirap na siyang kumain. Because of the swine flu scare at kagagaling ni James (Yap) at ako sa Hong Kong, sinabihan ako ng mga doktor na earliest I could go was June 30, noong after the 10 days. So, June 30, Tuesday, I didn't go to SNN (Showbiz News Ngayon). I stayed with Mom the whole day.

Cory's daughter recalls last days with mother in The Buzz 1July 1, Wednesday, si Dr. Francis Lopez, who I must pay tribute to kasi ang bait bait niya, maalaga, compassionate pero nagawa niyang ma-explain sa akin ng maayos. Mom was still in the surgical ICU unit. I asked Dr. Francis in the morning, diretso iyon, hindi ako umalis from Tuesday until... I probably got to talk to Francis at about 8:30 in the morning. At nagtanong ako sa kanya, 'Francis, what time frame are we looking at?' Tinanong niya ako, sabi niya, 'Kris, how much can you handle?' Sabi ko, 'I want the truth so that kung anong sasabihin mo sa akin, maibabahagi ko sa mga kapatid ko.'

Based on the last PET scan and because of fluid buildup sa tiyan ng Mom ko gumagrabe na. Ang ibig sabihin daw noon that the cancer was spreading rapidly. During the last PET scan... when we found out about Mom’s cancer it was Stage 4, meaning that not only the colon was affected but her liver as well.

Actually, the time that it was diagnosed, the initial diagnosis, they told us 3 months. But when they studied kung saan ang primary cancer, sinabi sa amin we're looking at 1 year, 18 months, two years.

Unfortunately, iyong stage noong cancer ng Mom at that point walang cure. We could only alleviate the pain and hopefully extend her life.

So, I asked Francis, this was Wednesday, July 1, sabi ko, 'Tatagal ba ang Mom hanggang August 21? Are we looking at a few months?' And he said, 'Weeks. I cannot promise you a month, Kris. We're looking at a few weeks.

Stages

I asked kung anong magagawa namin bilang pamilya. And he said sa pamilya daw, there are stages. Iyong una iyong knowledge, malalaman mo na ito iyong sakit. And then dadaan ko sa hope. You'll wish and you'll pray and you'll try everything to cure and then you'll accept. You'll accept you've done everything you can. And then the last part is letting go. It's giving it to God. Ibibigay mo sa Diyos, na Siya na ang bahala. And tinanong niya ako, 'At what point are you at?' And I said, 'If I'm talking about my family, kaming apat na babae nandoon kami sa letting go. Pero si 'Noy (sibling Sen. Benigno "Noynoy" Aquino III), wala pa doon.'

He said, 'Importanteng mag-usap kayo kasi sa maraming pamilya daw when difficult decisions have to be made, nag-aaway-away, nagkakagulo.' That night, nag-usap-usap ang mga kapatid ko, I chose to stay with Mom.

I have to share this with all of you. After her colon surgery but before the radiation therapy sa liver niya, ang Mom nagsabi kay Ate. Sabi niya, 'Ate, I'm ready to join dad (Benigno Aquino Jr).' And Ate said, 'Mom, we're not ready.'

And then that was the end of the conversation kasi it was so difficult to hear that. And I have to share with all of you na si Ate, from the time my dad died, was my Mom's confidential secretary, she was her right hand. She was there every single day with Mom. Noong nagkasakit si Mom, kay Ate siya tumira. So, among all of us, si Ate knew Mom best and si Ate ang shock absorber ng lahat.

After midnight, nag-SNN ako, nakuwento ko sa Mom, 'Mom, alam mo iyong media nakunan sa akin, wala akong pera sa ATM. Walang lumalabas.' Sabi niya, 'Why do you need money?' Sabi ko, 'I want to buy Starbucks.' And she said, 'You drink too much coffee. And I have money in my wallet, kumuha ka na lang.'

So, noong Thursday, July 2, we were moved already permanently to a room on the ninth floor of Makati Med. Iyong nutritional feeding kinontinue. Siguro dahil doon sa comment ko about needing money, my Mom said, 'Tawagan mo si Ate ha, make sure na ang mga tao sa Times (Street) nasuwelduhan. And make sure ang mga allowance ng mga guard niya nabigay.'

That's what kind of person my Mom is. Everybody who has worked for our family, years ang tinagal. May 47 years. Her driver, Norie was there since I was four. So, that's 34 years. Her two closest bodyguard, si Mel in particular, was with her from Malacanang. So, parang sinisigurado pa niya na, 'make sure kumpleto ang allowance nakuha nila.'

July 3, Friday, iyon ang birthday ng Lolo Pepe ko. So, pumunta ang Auntie Pazzi, pumunta si Auntie-- Uncle Joe, Mom was trying to tell them, 'Uy, I'm better. Tingnan niyo ang fluids sa tiyan ko kumukonti.' I left with them but the nurse told Ate, when I left with my aunts and uncles, Mom turned. She started crying. She never wanted any of us to see her cry, Boy. And at that point I knew na she wanted her siblings to still feel na matapang siya, na kinakaya niya.

Baby James

Noong July 4 na Saturday, this is one of our happy memories. The kids were with me the whole day and sinabi ng Mom, si Josh marunong nang mag-behave pero iyong maliit ang ingay talaga ano? Kasi baby James kept trying to wake her up "Lola, Lola" the innocence of childhood talaga. I remembered then na when we first found out that Mom was sick she said 'I want to be around for the first birthday of baby James.' And if people remember it was during that celebration, she was able to thank everybody because that was around 1 month before we announced that she had cancer. And then pinilit niya talaga na she was okay for the 2nd birthday.

But for Josh's 14th birthday, nagka-dengue ang mga anak ko. Because they were sick they couldn't be with Mom. But for our last time together, she made sure may cake si Josh na mabo-blow ng dalawa. After, we would hear mass kasi sa Meralco it was near Greenmeadows and it was a belated birthday celebration for Josh. And ‘yong parang sabi ng Mom na mag-order ng mga food carts na favorite ni Josh. That's what kind of Lola she was. And then she was so concerned about my nephew Miguel, who was a fresh graduate, getting a good job. She was so proud of Jiggy nung na-promote sa Nestle.

Noong July 5, Sunday, nabahagi ko sa lahat what we were going through. I told everybody how grateful we were and I said sana, maintindihan niyo kung hindi muna kami magkuwento ng lahat. After that, I went home, I had a shower, nagpictorial ako for 8 O'Clock. The next day, nagshoot ako ng commercial and super happy ang Mom kasi sabi niya na every new commericial daw, she would feel na parang, alam mo naman sa bayan natin, Boy [Abunda], pag may endorsement ka, you're a big deal. So parang sinasabi ng Mom na pag nalalaman niyang may bagong endorsement, nase-secure siya for me.

So, July 6, I shot the commercial. July 7, I went to the supermarket, I went to S&R, bumili na ako ng gamit para hindi na ako ever magpabili ng kape. Nagdala na ako ng coffee maker sa loob ng kuwarto niya. And our schedule was set, nag-ayusan na kami ng schedule na Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday nights, doon ako natutulog. Thursday, umuuwi ako, nagta-take over si ‘Noy. Friday hanggang Buzz, hindi nanaman ako umaalis. And then my sisters would take turns being there daytime.

Inside the bathroom

We had mass July 7 but if you ask me what my most painful memory was, it was July 8.

I'm glad I was there with my sister Pinky because it was mid-afternoon this is the first time Mom broke down. Iyong first time na umiyak talaga ang Mom, siguro sa tindi ng sakit, sa realization that she's gonna miss us. And it's so hard. It's so hard to see your mother cry and to know that you can do nothing. I just kept telling her, 'Mom I love you so much' and she was telling us gusto ko nang umuwi. And I knew umuwi does not mean na uuwi siya sa bahay, but umuwi was to join God. And hindi ako umiyak sa harap niya... I swear, I really, really did not cry. I cried inside the bathroom. And we called the whole family. They came so that we could reassure Mom that we were there.

It was our wedding anniversary July 10. And Mom greeted us. And then she said, 'Happy Anniversary James and Kris' and then she was asking James, 'Kailan ka aalis?' Kasi parang she would always tell James when James was saying na pagod na pagod na siya doon sa double practice. Sabi niya, 'you know, you're playing for the country. So James, tiisin mo na lang.' And James told her na July 16 siya aalis for Taiwan. So the routine was like that. July 13 to 17, I would be there the entire time, dadating sila, aayusan ako ng 8 p.m., aalis kami, mage-SNN, babalik ako.

And then Ate told me July 15, "Krissy, go home. Stay ka with James, paalis na siya. And then just come back tomorrow.' And I packed for James, nakapag-ayos ako, nag-ayos ako ng lahat ng gamit. And then noong July 19, that's when I said on the Buzz that I was going to take a leave, that I didn't want to leave Mom's side. Alala ko after Buzz, dumaan ulit ako sa supermarket, namili ulit ako sa S&R sabi ko, That was my role sa family, mag-alaga. Kasi I wanted my family-- my sisters, parang all of them, being in the hospital was so difficult but kasi ilang times na ako nako-confine, I'll make everybody as comfortable as possible. So I told all of them, sinabi ko sa mga kapatid ko, hindi ako aalis dito until Mom leaves.

So, that was Juily 19. And from July 20, I didn't leave from that day onwards. My routine would be, maraming tao kasi during the day and during the night, but from 12 midnight onwards, it was really just us and her nurses. So I'd sit by her bed, I brought a small lamp so I could read, or magla-laptop ako. And I tried to stay awake till 5 in the morning para kung may daing or may sasabihin. (Boy: You were awake?) I was there. And then may pamahiin po tayong mga Pilipino na binahagi sa amin ng maraming kaibigan, na bumulong daw. Na kung mahal na mahal mo iyong tao at nakikita mong nagsa-suffer, have the courage to tell that person that you will be okay. And that you're releasing that person.

Go!

Papunta tayo ng July 21, Tuesday, I was alone. It was about 2 in the morning, with the permission of my sisters, tinimingan ko na gising si Mom, nag-rosary muna ako so I'd have the courage. Mata sa mata, eye to eye, I was able to tell her, 'Mom we love you so much, nag-usap kaming lahat. We know that you are fighting this cancer because you loved us and you know that we weren't ready. But I said Mom you know, nagi-guilty na kami kasi nakikita namin na nahihirapan ka. And I told her na we all talked about it Mom and we can promise you na aalagaan namin ang isa't isa. We're gonna take care of each other. But Mom we're ready. We're ready for you to join God. Kasi ayaw na naming nakikitang nahihirapan ka. And I said I'm sorry Mom na nahihirapan ka this much. I didn't cry, that whole time. Again kasi prinomise ko sa mga kapatid ko na when I'm talking to Mom hindi ako iiyak. And Boy, you know she told me, "Kris don't worry." ‘Yong parang, sinasabi niya na wag nalang ako mag-alala. She didn't want me to go on because she knew from the way my voice was cracking kung ano ang emotions ko, kaya sinabi niya "Don't worry."

And all my life, all our lives, it's been that way with Mom. Kasi parang people were saying na, hindi mo ba na-feel dati na nakakulong ang dad mo? And I said, no because Mom made it feel so normal. When my Dad died, Boy alam mo, araw-araw, because I would be crying in school, sinusundo niya ako. Alam niya lahat lahat ng pinagdaanan ko, Mom has been there. So ‘yong sinasabi niyang "Don't worry" na ‘yon, totoo iyon. I've never had to worry kasi si Mom ang nag-aasikaso ng lahat. I told my siblings that I was able to say it, and the next day, my sister Viel came, and she repeated the same words to Mom.

That day, nagkatampuhan kami ni Deo. And, I was crying talaga in the bathroom, but I never showed Mom I was crying. I didn't even tell my sisters na nagkaroon ng problema sa work. Talagang nanahimik lang ako kasi sabi ko bakit ko dadagdagan ang problema nila, eventually maaayos ‘to.

It was, madaling araw papunta tayo ng Wednesday. Humiwalay ako for a while kasi I was drinking coffee and the nurses called me. Si EJ, was my Mom's nurse from ICU, marami silang nagta-take turns. Pero si EJ ang group e, they called me, they said sinasabi po ng Mom niyo, eto po yung exact words, she told the nurses and she was wide awake ha, "I can already see Ninoy." Boy, I rushed in, there was just one small lamp,. madilim ang kuwarto, nakahiga ang Mom,. but it was like there was a spotlight on Mom because she kept looking up. And I said, Mom you can see Dad? And she said yes. And I said is he calling you? She said yes. I said Mom kasi Dad's in heaven so he's calling you to be with him. So does he want to hold your hand? And she said yes, and I said Mom go. If he wants to hold your hand, that means gusto ka niyang dalhin sa langit. Go with dad. And you know, Boy? That was the first time I saw my Mom smile again. ‘Yong talagang that aura of peace, ‘yong talagang ngayon lang napangiti ng ganoon.

So, I told them what happened., And I didn't leave her na until there was sunrise. So tinext ko sa mga kapatid ko. But the whole time, beside me I could hear her saying Ninoy over and over again.

Family

July 22, Wednesday, her pain was so much worse, as in grabe na. Nag-insert na kami ng catheter kasi medyo hirap na ang Mom ko ngayon to go to the bathroom. I asked her sabi ko, it was again my sister Pinky and I and I said Mom what do you want. Yung last words na very clear talaga was "family." Family. So I said, I'll call all of them Mom. So we’re calling them but nag-uusap kami. The doctors told us na everything you want to say now, say it.

Nagsorry ako, sabi ko Mom for all those times ha? Na I was not the daughter you wanted. I'm sorry. And I said, I promise you Mom, I'll always share sa mga kapatid ko. And then I asked her kasi she's always worried kapag nababalitaan niya na nag-aaway kami ni James. Sabi ko Mom, do you want us to get married in church? Sabi niya yes. Sabi ko Mom, gusto mo iyong same anniversary as yours? She said yes. And I said Mom I know ‘yong mga kapatid ko they don't like kampanya. I said I promise you for the remainder of Noy's political career, aalagaan ko si Noy. Inaako ko iyon for you Mom. Kasi the time that Noy was campaigning for the Senate, I was bedridden. So sabi ko kung ano man ang gagawin ni Noy in the future, Mom maaasahan mo, I'm there.

I asked her, Mom ano gusto mo. Sabi niya, si Ate. So we called Ate. And then everyone was around her praying, everybody was able to say thank you. And Noy was able to tell her that he was okay. Lahat went near her, I don't know his exact words pero nakalapit siya. But it was later that night when they all left, ako nalang mag-isa again. She called the nurses, sabi niya, tawagin niyo si Kris. So I went near her, and then Mom said, "Kris, I love you." And she said Please, she said please, sabihin mo sa kanila, tama na. I knew boy that that night was a turning point.

So the next day, it was Thursday, July 23. Si Francis again was explaining to me, Kris we're at that point na iyong Demerol na binibigay sa Mom, iyong level niyan can lead to a seizure. The only way we can stop the Demerol and move on to morphine is if we stop the nutrition. She'll still be hydrated with the IV fluid, but we'll stop the nutrition kasi hindi na pwede mag-insert. She had one here, ‘yan yung port, that was where all the chemotherapy was doon dinadaan. So he told me, your family, are you prepared kasi baka hindi niyo na siya makausap. I said I have to call. I can;'t make the decision na ako lang,. I'll call one of my sisters. I was able to talk to Viel and to Pinky and they said Is there no way na itutuloy niya na itututoy pa iyong nutrition with the morphine? In-explain ko na hindi na pwede, kasi isa lang yung port, iyung pinagdadaanan. So they said, Ok Kris.

Before you are able to do that, Boy, kailangan niyo pumirma ng papeles. The hospital gives you papers, about no resuscitation and no life support pag terminal na iyong illness. May mahabang explanation doon because of our Roman Catholic faith. I signed. I signed the papers. I was alone when they were changing from what was being fed to her to the normal IV fluid to the morphine and I was praying using her rosary, the one that Sister Lucia gave her from Fatima. And I was praying God please help me to have made the right decision. Help Mom please. I just kept saying, Mama Mary prinomise mo, through all the messages and to us na you're embracing Mom, please embrace her now.

Boy, we were told from that time na lumipat kami doon na critical every 72 hours. Ang babantayan mo every 72 hours kasi doon daw nagbabago ang vital signs. Okay, ito po yung hanggang ngayon hindi ko maintindihan kasi walang medical explanation. She was on morphine, she was on Dormicum, but that night everybody was there and when they left it was just Ate and me. I would always joke Mom na: ‘Mom kami ni Ate talaga ang dalawang favorites mo and she would say, ‘Hay naku lahat kayo favorite.’ And Ate was beside her. Boy lahat ng gamot na iyon was inside her so dapat tulog siya. She forced herself, I don’t know if it was willpower of if gusto niya ipaabot kay Ate how much she appreciated Ate.

She looked at Ate and she said thank you. Because that was the only time that Ate was able to tell her. Sinabi ng Ate na: Mom, remember when I said I wasn't okay yet? I want you to be happy with Dad no matter how sad we're gonna be. Pipilitin namin maging okay because that's how much I love you. And ate said I love you super duper Mom, mag-rest ka na. Kaming dalawa lang ni Ate ang nandoon. And I know how much courage it took my Ate to be able to say that. Because si Ate was the one decider through it all., And si Ate excused herself because she broke down. And then Mom was looking at me na parang she was trying to tell me na i-comfort mo Ate mo. Alam mo Boy? I just have to say this na, our family has been so blessed to have our Ate. For being for all my siblings,. siya talaga ang nag-aabsorb ng lahat. Siya yung parating voice of reason. Siya iyong nagsasabi na, at that point nasabi ko na iyong tampuhan sa ABS, sabi niya Krissy, Tita Cory loves you so much, maaayos yan.

It was the next day that we allowed closest friends to see Mom. I won't name pero pumayag kami na lumapit sila.

State funeral?

July 25. I want to say something and I really hope na hindi mabigyan ito ng kulay pulitika.

I just want to explain some things about our decisions as a family. May mga lumapit po kasi just because you are on the opposite sides of the political fence it doesn;t mean na merong mga tao sa administrasyong ito na hindi namin kaibigan . There are those who have remained friends. So somebody came, I won't name the person, but he was quite close to Mom. Asking, it’s not proper, but it has been talked about na if she goes, would you want na may state funeral na the wake would be held in Malacanang? Noy was there but I said ako magsasalita para hindi niyo sabihin na namumulitika kami. Medyo na-ano ako Boy, nasabihan kasi na kung damned if you do, damned if you don't ang sitwasyon kasi nila. Kung hindi mag-offer, parang masama., Kung mag-offer at tumanggi kami, masama pa rin. I'm sorry but at that point I really said, hindi ko problema ang problema niyo. Ang problema ko lang ang Mom. And I said I’m speaking on behalf of everybody. Malacanang doesn't have to give honor sa Mom ko kasi ang honor nanggagaling sa bayan natin.

I will share this so you will understand as a daughter how I feel. It is my Mom's right na meron siyang security. Every former president has that. July, Boy, I don’t know it was explained to me na the units taking care of former presidents were being dissolved. So parang tinatawag back. Hindi ko na maintindihan kung saan basta anyway, they were made to explain and hinihingan ng formal letter ang Mom ko na bakit mare-retain si Mel at si Chris. Dalawa lang ‘yon. Noy was the one who took care of it. Former presidents are entitled to security, basta nung July kasi iba-back to mother unit something pero this was July na at the time na nasa hospital na si Mom. Okay so it was explained to me na hindi naman daw nire-recall ang security ng Mom, inaayos lang daw for accounting purposes.

When I brought it up na sinabi ko, sorry ah, pero sinabi ko noong time na ‘yon, gusto niyo bigyan ng honor and Mom ngayon eh noong president nga siya, eh ngayon na may sakit siya, and you view her as a president and gusto niyong bawiin. Siyempre, emotional ako at ‘yon ang nararamdaman ko bilang anak., So na-explain nang mabuti sa amin pero ngayon I’m just trying so that Noy will never have to speak of this, I am not running for political office, I have no ambitions in the near future, sinasabi ko lang po sa inyo na si Mel at si Chris are like family to us. [Boy: 23 years] I saw them crying by my Mom's bedside with us. Sila ang kasams ng Mom sa bawat check up, sila ang kasama sa bawat operasyon, sa gabi pag wala akong kasama, sila ang kasama ko. They're like family. Binilin ng Mom specifically kay Ate na before she goes, to make sure we take care of them. ‘Yon lang eh, Boy , ‘yong konting respeto lang na ‘yon, ‘wag mo namang tanggalin iyong security blanket ng Mom ko. It really hurt me. It hurt me because I understand politics and I understand na may impluwensiya ka, pahihirapan mo iyong kalaban mo. Pero ‘wag naman iyong maliliit. ‘Wag naman iyong dalawa na talagang nagmahal sa Mom.

In-explain sa akin nang maigi, tapos na yan. Pero gusto ko lang ibahagi on a personal level why we made the decisions we made. And I want to say thank you to everybody kung ano man ang hindi naibigay sa Mom, lahat kayo sobra sobra ang pagbibigay niyo sa kanya. There is no bitterness in our heart[s]. During my last conversation with Mom sabi ko sa kanyta, sabi ko Mom when I address the people, gusto mo sabihin ko sa kanila that you want everybody to be at peace? And she said yes. Do you want me to be able to tell people na pinapatawad mo lahat ng naging nakalaban natin at humihingi ka rin ng tawad sa lahat na, and she said yes. I would like to say I never thought the time would come. But I say thank you to the Marcoses for really praying for Mom. I felt the sincerity, boy. At gusto ko magpasalamat.

I'll move on to my story kasi this is on a family level naman. Saturday, July 25, nakiusap. [Boy: Why the family didn't allow a state funeral.] Well, it's not that we didn't allow, Boy. We just said, ‘wag na lang mag-offer para wala nang gulo, ayaw namin ng gulo. [Tahimik na lamang] yes. Yun yun eh, ayaw ng Mom ng gulo for the people especially. [Its still family's choice, the arrangements would be]

Stargazers

Saturday when the oldest sister of Dad came and she asked okay lang ba na pumunta si Tita Tessie, that's my Tita Tessie Oreta. Those who follow politics know that there was a while na hindi kami okay. Pero Tito Len, the husband of Tita Tessie, all throughout Mom's illness, every week or every other week diretso padala ng pagkain sa Mom, padala ng fruits. So when Auntie Maura asked me, I said: Sure kasi ako lang mag-isa eh. Sure Auntie Ma. In a way I feel that it's closure for the family. It's a lesson din na family should go beyond politics. ‘Yun ‘yung parang namulat sa mata ko noong panahon na ‘yon. I don’t know what Tita Tessie was able to tell Mom but she told me the reason she went was the night before, she dreamt of Dad. Nanaginip siya na sinabi ng daddy ko na Tessie, puntahan mo si Cory, Dalhan mo ng stargazers na bulaklak. So she asked me, mahilig ba Mom mo sa stargazers? Sabi ko hindi na masyado, pero she likes looking at stargazer flowers, but because of her asthma, nahihirapan nang matagalan.

[Although she would paint flowers.] And you [Boy] came, you're the only non-family member na pumunta,. I don;t know what you told Mom, assuming na sinabi mo na hindi mo talaga ako iiwan kasi hindi mo talaga akong iniwan. You were there you were praying by her bedside. [Boy: Quietly I was telling her na Tita to the best that I can hindi ko pababayaan si Kris at ang kanyang mga anak]

Jiuly 24, James came here early. He said kailangan mo na ba ako umuwi and I said oo, and he said uuwi ako ng gabi may kasama ka. RP team allowed him to leave earlier but he was asking me, kasi paalis ang team sa Tuesday and the coach was offering him na Thursday. And he was asking kung ituloy ko ang paglaro and I said Babe alam mo naman how important RP team was to Mom so dapat ituloy mo.

July 26, we had mass. Si Father Arevalo said Mass by Mom's bedside and that was the time that all of us broke down. Noong intercessory prayers kasi lahat kami shinare namin and doon ko naaalala na alam mo Mom sa dinami dami ng prinomise ko sa ‘yo I forgot to promise you na every niight kekwentuhan pa rin kita. ‘Yon ang job ko sa family, ako ang taga-aliw. I said na Mom you know I promise you every night before I sleep, kekewentuhan kita ng lahat ng nangyari sa family at lahat na nangyari sa akin and even in heaven , I'll try my best to keep on making you aliw.

Josh

And then I told her na the last physical act that my Mom was able to do was to hold Josh's hand. Kasi sinabi ni Josh sa kanya na "Lola, holding hands?" And that was the point na kahit blanket lang masakit na para sa Mama. ‘Yong kahit konting hawak lang masakit na pero nag-reach out siya and she held Josh's hand. Nag-holding hands sila ni Josh talaga. And I told her: Mom, ikaw na bahala kay Josh when you're in heaven na. Please make sure he'll be okay. It;s going to be so hard for him to understand Mom kung bakit wala ka na.

You know, Josh would see kasi noong nasa morphine stage na kami na iniikot yung katawan ni Mom tapos didilat ‘yong mata, parang ‘yong unseeing eyes, and Josh would start crying and would start throwing up in the bathroom kasi hindi niya ma-process ‘yong feelings and I said Mom you know of all of us, it will be hardest on Josh so please please take care of him.

From July 27 to 29 she was defying all medical science. they were telling us dapat at this point kidneys are shutting down. Dapat at this point erratic na iyong heart. She was holding on. Ganoon ka strong ang heart ng Mom.

I want to share this because I respect this man so much now. Nakiusap si [former] president Erap sa pamilya kung pwede siyang dumalaw and people close to both our families said okay lang sa kanila pero kung pwede tahimik na lang. Dumaan siya sa basement, umikot siya and media asked him kung nakausap niya ang Mom, kung nakapasok siya. Sabi niya nilabas lang ako ni ‘Noy at Kris. It's not true, we allowed him inside. But I think he wanted to give our family a privacy.... quietly you've been good to Mom. Mom was one of those in the forefront na ma-oust siya, sa kanya he reached out.

Watch video excerpts of the interview with Kris Aquino on The Buzz