Actress and vlogger Heart Evangelista advised her fans and subscribers to stop worrying about pleasing other people, citing her own personality as an example of a “people pleaser.”
In her vlog uploaded on Thursday, Evangelista shared some lessons she learned as she turned 36 last February, including the acceptance that some people may not like others no matter how kind they were to them.
“I am such a people pleaser like what I've said but you cannot keep worrying about pleasing somebody or not pleasing them. Sometimes we put so much energy thinking ‘na-offend ko ba siya? Parang di niya ko gusto? Parang di niya ko bet?’ But honestly, they are probably not thinking about you,” she said.
According to the actress, sometimes people still get rejected , despite how hard they try to please others.
“Minsan nasa kanila na lang kung gusto ko nila or hindi. Minsan kasi try ka nang try di ka naman gusto kawawa ka naman. Minsan hindi ka lang talaga nila gusto, in short, kahit mabait ka,” she quipped.
Evangelista, who is married to politician Chiz Escudero, admitted that it is difficult for her to avoid worrying about other people but realized it sometimes consumed her.
She went on to cite a personal experience with her driver when they were travelling to Sorsogon, where Escudero is the governor.
In her narration, Evangelista warned her driver not to drive fast regardless if they would spend more time on the road as long as they would arrive safely.
“I remember telling him na it's all right kahit mag 10 hours tayo wag na nating gawing 7 (hours), basta safe tayo. [Then] I remember I woke up because they were really speeding and they would take over [other cars],” she recalled.
The actress recounted how she struggled to remind his driver again, fearing he might get upset, but still did it anyways. "Kuya wag masyadong mabilis baka mabangga tayo," she said.
“You know just saying that or exactly like that, hindi na ko makatulog. ‘Shocks baka naoffend ko siya,’” Evangelista revealed.
Here are the other life lessons she realized:
- It's okay to lose and outgrow friends.
- Be with someone who doesn't hold you back.
- It's okay not to be okay.
- Allow yourself to be happy.
- Social media is both a great and horrible world. Be responsible.
- Consistency is key.
- Family is everything.
- You must love yourself first. You cannot give what you don't have.
- Changing your perspective changes everything.