MANILA – John Lloyd Cruz does not think he was ready to become a father when he and his former girlfriend, actress Ellen Adarna, welcomed their son Elias.
“Tingin ko isang bagay siya na akala mo ready ka because you wanted it. We like to believe na we are in control. We like that idea na ‘Hindi, it’s my plan. Plinano ko iyan.’ It took me a while para matanggap na akala mo ginusto mo, akala mo plinano mo but in reality, especially ngayon after tatlong taon, iba eh. Hindi eh,” he told Karen Davila in her new podcast.
For Cruz, there is no way a person can plan how he can deal with such a life-changing event.
“And it won’t be as humbling kung ‘Talaga, naplano mo? Paano mong naplano 'yung ganung bagay?’ Kasi it’s beyond words. Describing being a father especially nung lumabas siya, there’s no way na merong tao na naplano 'yung ganung ka-weird and ka-radical na bagay. That’s a life. Buhay 'yung lumabas because of your responsibility,” he said.
Cruz, however, stressed that he was not scared of the responsibilities that came when his son was born.
“I didn’t get scared [of the responsibilities] at all. I was scared to admit na parang medyo it’s a little bit too much than what I expected. But I think that’s the whole essence of it.”
According to Cruz, he is an active father but not as much as he wants to because he’s co-parenting Elias with Adarna.
“Siyempre mas nagspe-spend time 'yung dalawa,” he said.
Describing fatherhood, Cruz said it’s probably the most fascinating thing in his life right now.
“What I’m learning from him, what I’m learning about him, ang galling. Parang you’ll submit to it,” he said.