MANILA - Actress Nadine Lustre has admitted that she blamed herself for her brother's suicide, as she opened up about her own struggles with depression and anxiety.
"I was completely destroyed when my brother passed away. It was super sudden. I just felt like as his big sister...I was blaming myself," Lustre said in an interview on ANC's "Headstart" Friday.
"Actually, the whole family we were all blaming ourselves. We could have saved him. We could have done something. Or sana I nagged him a bit more to open up to me," Lustre said.
But she said she eventually accepted what had happened.
Asked if they had an inkling on what her brother was going through, Lustre said it was only after the suicide that they found his blog posts, which included poems.
"He was really going through a lot based on what he was writing down. But he never opened up to us. I think the most important thing you can do with someone who has depression is to talk to him," she said.
Lustre said she also got depressed three to four years ago, when she realized that her life was changing because of her work.
"There was pressure. I was really insecure. I had a lot of issues with myself. I didn't know who I was. I was so lost," she said.
At one point, she went on a vacation with friends abroad and did not want to go back to the Philippines.
"I never said this to anyone. I was also a little bit suicidal before. Parang I can't take it anymore. I just wanted to kill myself," she said.
Lustre explained that her mindset eventually changed when she started appreciating the good things that she had.
Although she still gets anxious, her relationship with actor James Reid has helped a lot.
"He's also going through things. Kaming dalawa nagtulungan kami," she said, explaining how she would call Reid during times when she was not feeling well. Reid, in turn, would talk to her and help her with what she was going through.
Lustre said she is now more relaxed and has learned not to stress out about things.
A group in the Philippines is dedicated to addressing those who have suicidal tendencies.
The crisis hotlines of the Natasha Goulbourn Foundation aim to make these individuals feel that someone is ready to listen to them.
These are their hotline numbers:
Information and Crisis Intervention Center
(02) 804-HOPE (4673)
0917-558-HOPE (4673) or (632) 211-4550
0917-852-HOPE (4673) or (632) 964-6876
0917-842-HOPE (4673) or (632) 964-4084
In Touch Crisis Lines:
0917-572-HOPE or (632) 211-1305
(02) 893-7606 (24/7)
(02) 893-7603 (Mon-Fri, 9 am-5 pm)
Globe (63917) 800.1123 or (632) 506.7314
Sun (63922) 893.8944 or (632) 346.8776