Forever

Tin Bartolome

Posted at Oct 24 2015 02:19 AM | Updated as of Oct 24 2015 10:19 AM

Forever is a big word—especially when it comes to love. No matter how sincere we are when we promise forever, there is no guarantee that it will indeed be forever. Or is there?

Leo Buscaglia said, “What love we’ve given, we’ll have forever. What love we fail to give, will be lost for all eternity.” Explaining this quote in The Empty Round Table, Chicago blogger Jenielle Bailey said, “What good is the love we have in our hearts for the world around us if it goes unplanted, uncultivated and unexpressed? What purpose can it serve to feel a deep love within ourselves for anything or anyone beyond ourselves if we lock it in a safe box and bury it beneath the earth?”

Unless it is felt by the beloved, love is nothing more than a feeling—that feeling has to be given away to be called love. What is not guaranteed is that the love we give will be given to us in return. If we make noontime shows our gauge, then we can safely say that indeed, love—whether or not reciprocated—makes the world turn, or stops it. As I see it, the television ratings war has been heightened by this thing called “forever”—by love, if you will—or the search for it. One found it, albeit unexpectedly, while the other lost it and is currently searching.

We find it so easy to empathize with lovers onscreen and many times, do not realize we have begun reminiscing our own experiences. So this must be something universal, this thing called “forever”. I often wonder how much actors are affected by the roles they play. Do they actually fall in love on screen the same way in real life? And what happens if only one of them falls in love? Is it possible for “forever” to be one-sided?

I heard the story of a distant relative who found his first love decades after they parted ways because of the war. She remained unmarried while he was already a widower when they crossed paths again. I assumed these things happened only in movies! I thought about it a lot and realized that if she had settled for someone else, then getting back together would have been close to impossible.

My mother told me that when she first met my father, he had someone else. Then years later, when their paths crossed again, they were both unattached— and so ready for their own “forever”. I never really heard them fight—though they had arguments every now and then. I just noticed how they were so into each other—even when my mother already had Alzheimer’s. During my father’s wake, she was even worried about him getting hungry and not being able to eat.

Looking back at the way my parents were as a couple, I saw that “forever” did not come easy for them. They actually built their own forever. Years after they passed, I dreamt that I was attending their requiem Mass and my father asked what why the Mass was taking so long. Then I remembered my promise to bring their ashes together. That made me realize that “forever” is possible—if you find the right one to share it with, the one who is willing to put in as much as you would to make it come true.

Disclaimer: The views in this blog are those of the blogger and do not necessarily reflect the views of ABS-CBN Corp.