OPINION: Should the Vice President be impeached?

Alan Robles - Hot Manila

Posted at Apr 08 2017 01:35 AM | Updated as of Apr 08 2017 04:50 AM

Thousands of Filipinos have been savagely killed in eight months, and the murders haven't stopped. The President has repeatedly said he wants to kill millions. The police have been implicated in the slayings, as well as in violations of human rights. Investors are pulling out, foreign aid has been slashed and China has grabbed Philippine territory.

Why is this happening? Simple. IT'S THE VICE PRESIDENT'S FAULT. SHE SHOULD BE IMPEACHED.

You don't believe it? Neither did we, until we took the simple, test below, prepared by Palace political consultant Professor Bokal von Kopya. Try it and see. The test is a realistic political appraisal marked by the detachment we can expect from Prof von Kopya.

Read each question, pick the answer you think is correct and no matter what you choose, you will be shocked to realize that you, too, will arrive at the alarming and sensational conclusion that IT'S ALL THE VICE PRESIDENT'S FAULT. SHE SHOULD BE IMPEACHED.

Should the Vice President be impeached?
1. Is your vice president a drug addict?
         a. yes
         b. yes
         c. yes

2. Is your vice president shifty looking?
         a. yes
         b. yes
         c. yes

3: Is your vice president a sleazy, lying, stealing SOB?
         a. yes
         b. yes
         c. yes

4. Is your vice president named Bongbong Marcos?
         a. yes - wait YOU STUPID FOOL YOU'RE GETTING AHEAD OF THE STORY

5. Oops sorry about that
         a. start again

6. Ok here goes. Are you ready?
         a. game

7. Does the president take fentanyl?
         a. Yes - the vice president should be impeached
         b. No - the vice president should be impeached
         c. It's the vice president's fault, she should be impeached

8. Does the president talk and behave like an obscene dirtbag in public?
         a. Yes - the vice president should be impeached
         b. No - the vice president should be impeached
         c. I don't know. The vice president should be impeached

9. Does the president endorse murdering people left and right?
         a. Only during weekdays. The vice president should be impeached.
         b. Left and right and up and down. The vice president should be  impeached.
         c. The vice president should be impeached.

10. The Vice President reported the wave of extrajudicial killings here to the United Nations. Was she being unpatriotic?
         a. Yes - she should be impeached.
         b. No - she should be impeached
         c. I don't know - the vice president should be impeached.

11. Is it true the Vice President has yoga lessons in her office?
         a. Yes - she should be impeached
         b. No - she should be impeached
         c. I don't know - the vice president should be impeached

12. Have you seen the Vice President standing in the shade, away from the hot sun?
         a. Yes - she should be impeached
         b. No - she should be impeached
         c. I don't know - she should be impeached

13. There are many pictures of the Vice President standing while smiling. Isn't this suspicious?
         a. Yes- she should be impeached
         b. No - she should be impeached
         c. I don't know - she should be impeached

14. Do you feel that this study is impartial and the person who made it should be made assistant secretary?
         a. Yes - the vice president should be impeached
         b. Yes - the vice president should be impeached
         c. The vice president should be impeached

Disclaimer: The views in this blog are those of the blogger and do not necessarily reflect the views of ABS-CBN Corp.